Creating 2020 So Your 2019 is Wonderfully Planned

I saw Rich Litvin ask his clients to focus on 2020, and I thought I would take it on myself.  2018 – can you believe is almost over? Most coach always asks me to focus and reflect. However, my coach, Patty DeDominic, asked me to start focusing on 2019. Then, Rich talked about focusing on 2020.  Focusing on 2020 makes a lot of sense coupled with what my coach asked me to work- my business. It makes a hell of a lot of sense!  Why? Because if I have 2020 in mind, then I am going to plan and prove that 2019 was fantastic.

How is that possible?  As a creative, I am always thinking of new and creative things. I am always thinking of a vision. Many of us are always being reactive which can make us crazy.  Well, I am of the mind that life is created as opposed to being reacted to.  I used to be very reactive. I still am a little. The difference is that I now recognize it and can cut it off the moment I experience it.  Being reactive takes a lot of energy and robs me of life and the possibility of my dreams.

I had an amazing life in 2018!  All I can say is that I am happy.  I have learned a lot about myself and my life and contributed a lot to my clients.  I have transformed myself and my business by putting a lot of ways of being and steps in place for success.  My commitments have been consistent. I am happy and excited about the future, no matter what happens, because I am present and ready to be ready (in the words of Abraham Hicks and the law of attraction). My clients received much value from my services as their Personal Life Coach, and that will only get better.  I created and brought that value that I desired to bring to their life, and they bring value to my life.

Do you want to have a progressive and wonderful 2020? If you want to have a great 2020, you have to make sure that your 2019 is amazing so that it folds into 2020 with ease.

We are creative people. We create our lives every day, whether in a good way or a bad way. The challenge of being creative is that we are always thinking about the future. We spend very little time reflecting on what we are proud of or grateful for. This is the time of year to start looking.

 

What are you most proud of — just one little thing?

  • I asked four of my clients a question that resulted in them getting engaged to the love of their life and being married.
  • I asked one of my clients a question that resulted in her creating a new job and making the salary of her dreams with a company where her personal and professional mission was in alignment. 
  • I asked one of my clients a question that resulted in her becoming an Angel investor. 
  • I asked one of my clients a question that resulted in her getting a huge bonus.
  • I asked one of my clients a question that resulted in him being complete with the death of his father 5 years ago and being at peace with the death of his mother, knowing that his parents were proud of him.  
  • I asked one of my clients a question and had her write her personal and professional mission which resulted in her getting a job, getting paid what she wanted with all the perks she wanted, even the perks she did not know she wanted.
  • I asked one of my clients a question which resultedin her telecommuting one day, something that her company had never done before.
  • I asked one of my clients a question that resulted inher leaving her divorce behind and moving to another country, creating an excellent job and creating a new relationship where she is living life her way. 
  • I asked my client one question that resulted in her becoming a significant contributor to the success of her company.
  • I asked my client one question that resulted in her falling in love with herself and realizing that she deserved all that she wanted in her life. Now, she knows she is the creator of her reality.  
  • I asked my client one question, and she increased her income and got a fabulous new job in approximately 3 days.

 

As your coach, I ask questions that will make you nervous.

I have you face the things you are avoiding at all costs. 

I have you create small actions that’ll make a massive difference. 

I have you be present in your life. 

I have you be accountable in your life. 

I have you create a positive relationship with yourself first and foremost.

 

I love coaching. I have been called magical; however, I can assure you that I do not have a magic wand.  But, I will help you tune into yourself in a way that you have never done before.  Here is what I request of you:

#1: Schedule yourself for a free 15 Hello Call. Be open to listen and share yourself on this call.  This call is the beginning of what will be a transformation in your life.

#2: You will need to be open to listening and sharing completely. Be judgment free of yourself.  Do this, and I promise you that your life will already begin to change.

Thank you, Rich Litvin, for your layout and contribution to me.

 

 

Rah Rah Person

For years I called myself the “Rah Rah Person” (like a cheerleader) until I found out that I was being a coach.  In July 2005, after taking classes at NYU, I declared myself a personal life coach. Today, I know that it has been the best choice in and for my life.

I no longer wanted to be a Real Estate Broker, and it was a difficult choice to leave the industry. At the time I was happy, and everything was clicking.

Then, why was I crying on my couch? I was done being a Real Estate Broker, and I didn’t know why because I still loved it.  I discovered I could leave something that I loved.  It was the end of a career, and I didn’t have to hate it or make it wrong. It was time.  I’d be miserable if I stayed and so would my clients.  I let my license expire, and I chose. You can do this even if nothing seems wrong, even when things seem to be working.

Even with my new certification and declaring myself a personal life coach, it was scary.  I don’t remember being scared of being a realtor. It had tangible, physical properties. Whereas with coaching, it’s all intellectual property, and the work was from the ground up.  I had to relearn how to listen and how to hold space and a slew of other skills.  Rewiring and understanding that what I saw was not necessarily so and taking it with a grain of salt or something.

I recreated and stretched myself out into the world to generate clients. I messed up, made mistakes and blunders.  Without clients, I was not a coach. Being a good coach was not enough.  I had to enroll and register people to become my clients and use me. I wanted clients but not just any clients, extraordinary clients who did the work and got results, clients who were able to co-create and grow with me and take action to get the results they said they wanted and be open to results they did not know they wanted.  They had to grow to like and trust me.  I had to be able to say the things that no one else would dare say and have them commit to making the difference they said they wanted.

13 years in, I have a career I love, and people still ask me, “Noreen, what does a personal life coach do?”  In a nutshell, I help people create and manifest their dreams.  I am a miracle-maker.  My clients now see themselves powerfully and know they deserve a life they love.

One client said it like this in a testimonial:

I had the honor of working with Noreen Sumpter during several of her workshops and they were all incredible experiences! She is a key figure in my growth and development as a young woman. I continue to be deeply grateful for the gift and blessing that she is as a coach and leader. She is someone who lives so that others may awaken to the people they truly are. She is a beacon of light in my life. I can confidently say that there are many, many, many people in this world who have also worked with Noreen and who feel the same way!

I celebrate because I now contribute in ways that I didn’t dream of, and I am loving me and my life.  My clients come to live and be extraordinary in their life.  They are now shiny and bright and confident.  They own their power, speak their truth, and live life on their own terms.  I love my clients. I support them to build confidence and develop self-esteem so they can connect with their true selves.  My clients are accountable to own their power. They get out of their way so they can accomplish dreams.  I love my work. I do kick their butts if it is necessary and will terminate our relationship if they are not doing the work to get the results they want.

It has opened a world of joy and happiness for myself and my clients.  It has allowed me to grow develop and create the life that I love, and in turn that my clients love.

This year I celebrate 13 years! I applaud my success  I have given myself permission to be, do and have- to own my voice, speak my truth, and live life my way.  I stand in my belief that finding our path is critical and that doing what I love, I give, knowing that I am the source of my abundance and that helps me prosper, and others flourish. It’s a win-win.

Congratulations, to you my dear, Noreen Sumpter. Keep expanding, growing, and developing, sharing your gifts with others.

Fear, Doubt and Judgment Create Opinions that Kill Dreams

It is 2017… I just finished speaking, and people are introducing themselves and thanking me. “You changed the energy in the room.”  ” I would love to speak with you.”  “Do you have a card?“ People want my attention. I’m being pulled in many directions. I love it. I know some people fear public speaking.

There’s one lady that stuck out in high definition.  My mind immediately went rogue, aka judgment. She didn’t seem approachable. Truth is, she doesn’t have to be. Regardless, I introduce myself to her. We exchange details and promise to connect.  We agreed to do a Zoom video conferencing call.

Zoom was awkward at first, but then it became comfortable as we talked. We asked and answered questions. Why NY? She’s English. We got comfortable and laughed. She asked me if I’d heard of NAWBO.  I had not. Google is my best friend.  She said it was NAWBO, the National Association of Women Business Owners, and she’d love to have me on the board. “Sure,” I said. My one caveat: NAWBO had to be diverse.  A year later, I sit on the board of NAWBO, a fantastic organization set up to empower women.  With NAWBO my creativity is unabashedly unleashed.

I’m sharing this story because it’s important to stay out of your way (your head) and meet people.  What you and I think about someone is immaterial. Noticing and pushing past your judgments is essential.  

Consider how many people you didn’t speak to because of an opinion?  Opinions are the gap between your dreams and goals fulfilled.  Do you want to fulfill your goals and dreams? I’d like to request three things:   

  • CHECK your fear, doubt, judgments and opinion at the door.
  • Make contact. Get curious. Spot someone. Make eye contact.  Share a smile.
  • Begin a conversation. Say hello.

Live Life Your Way.  

Forgiveness is a Gift You Give Yourself

People who are angry often lose sight of why they were offended in the first place; all they know is that they’re right and the other person is wrong. Being right makes the person angry and he/she goes around making everyone else angry. Learning to understand yourself and forgive provides the tools to understand what it feels like to forgive. Forgiveness is like a much needed refreshing drink on a scorching, hot day. After the first mouthful, you feel refreshed, and any pain you might’ve been experiencing is washed away. There’s no room to continue with one’s life in this way. I’ve definitely experienced forgiveness.

Here’s a list of things you and I may have experienced (that others have done to us or that we’ve done to others), that make us crave forgiveness:

Affairs
Criticism
Denigration
Being gossipped about
Pain
Abuse
Mistreatment
Cruelty
Violence
Exploitation
Misuse
Neglect
Disrespect
Dishonor
Fear

Words, like violence, hurt and leave memories and painful scars which causes and creates vengeance. Vengeance, like a disease, without a cure, is transmitted to others.

Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting. Forgiving doesn’t minimize or justify the act; it just releases the hurt that the past holds on you. I heard Oprah say many years ago on her show, that “forgiveness is a gift that you give yourself.” If you can’t forgive, you’re the one that’s left with the pain. You must learn to let go of the ill feelings of anger, hurt, and upset. Forgiveness unties your heart and frees you up. Forgiveness lives in the past. Every time you remember what happened, you relive the experience and it brings it back to the present moment. Forgiveness allows you the opportunity of staying in the present; providing you with empathy and compassion from the perceived wrongdoing.

We get hurt, and it’s usually by the people we love and are closest to because they’re the ones we’ve let into our lives. Family and friends can be the ones that abuse, betray, reject, and insult us and they’re the ones that we never expect to treat us this way. People we let into our hearts and homes do things we may might not like and we suffer instead of speaking out and honoring ourselves. Most of the time we’re mad at ourselves because we didn’t honor ourselves or speak up. We feel bad, and like I said before, it becomes like a disease because it’s a negative experience which affects our feelings.

If negative incidents are not handled immediately, they begin to grow bigger and fester, fill with the pollution of resentment, killing off any positive feelings, and becoming a blight in your existence. The resentment quickly immerses into bitterness and continues to kill off any positive feelings surrounding the person that’s wronged you. You can’t face the person and you find yourself having difficulty with this relationship and you begin to have trouble communicating. You become sensitive to the thought of any perceived insult, hurt, or conflict. Your sense of reality can become distorted. The continuance of you holding onto your pain and immersing yourself in suffering becomes a hefty price to pay.

You eventually begin to bring pain into every relationship (new and old) by repeating your story about what happened over and over again, reliving it over and over as if it happened yesterday. You are continually slicing the perceived wound open, never treating or giving it time to heal. It then becomes a part of you, and it does not need to be.

With forgiveness, we never have to identify with hurt or anger, it’s just knowing that what happened was not a good experience. Forgiveness is an act that one has to be consistent with. In the Bible, it says that, “we have to forgive 7×70.” It’s something we have to learn and acknowledge, or we will become victims of the circumstance. We have to learn to forgive our own mistakes, and with that, we learn to forgive ourselves and, in turn, we can forgive others. We have to forgive 7X70 which is 490 times. When you forgive yourself or another person, the feelings of upset, disappointment, and angriness vanish.

When I haven’t completed an experience and forgiven it, I’ve either felt butterflies in the pit of my stomach or I’ve felt uncomfortable because the past keeps rearing its ugly head and the anger, like acid, runs through my stomach and wants to come up. My mind goes into fight or flight mode which is how I know I haven’t forgiven the person. Truthfully, I’m suffering because I’m allowing the past to take hold of me. That’s when I realize I have to forgive again. The moment I gave up the anger and forgave, I was free. Free to honor myself and the person I was angry with. Some of us are good at holding onto the pain, holding on to malice from now until eternity. Anger is a feeling of being violated; our boundaries have been broken. We have to do the inner work, or we will be stuck with repressed feelings, live in denial, and we won’t feel good. When we forgive, our hearts expand and our feelings become whole, complete, and perfect. In turn, we feel honest and our giving of forgiveness becomes organic. There is space where there was none. You have to put yourself and your boundaries back together. Forgiveness helps you do that. It hurts and is a drain on your being to live in a closed-off space.

It’s good to feel the anger, be with it, not repress it, and allow it to take you over. Anger has information for us if we are willing to be with it and listen. We have to feel our anger and feel out the information it has for us. Anger is usually telling you that you have not taken care of yourself, and it’s time to take care of the wrong you feel. Put the integrity back in.

When you’re angry, ask yourself these questions to allow you to begin to get to a point of forgiveness:

Who are you angry at?
Why are you angry at him/her/them?
What boundaries do you feel he/she/they have violated?
How long have you been angry with him/her/them?
When will you give it up?
What actions do you have to take to give it up?
What promises will you make to yourself to begin the forgiveness process?

Are you angry and in need of forgiveness of yourself and others but don’t know how to begin the process? You can always reach out to me by visiting my website, www.noreensumptercoach.com and sign up for my FREE 15-minute Hello Call. What are you waiting for? Begin the forgiving and healing process NOW!

Love yourself. Until next time!

Are You Sexy?

Are you sexy, hot, the cat’s meow, all that, and a bag of chips? It’s a lot – and you might think it’s a crazy thing to think about. Whatever this question triggers, I want you to think about it and let it massage your mind. Then answer the question honestly. Do you think you’re sexy? And, who do you think you are? These questions are meant to be taken in a positive way without judgement and tone. What I mean is, who am I speaking to? Who are you intuitively? Do you have the confidence to say you’re sexy proudly?  Is who you are so clear you don’t have to say anything? If you’re confident about your sexuality, it’ll be clear to everyone and it will get reverberated back at you in your world.

Here’s another question for you – have you ever experienced a moment in your life when you’re feeling so sexy you hear it whispered in the wind?  It’s just who you are at that present instance.  You know you’re the cat’s meow, all that, and a bag of chips. You’re sexy.  And, you get to say it and feel it for yourself.  

So again, who you think you are can be translated to read, me for example: I’m a woman, I’m black, I’m tall, I’m English, I’m a Confidence and Self-esteem Coach, I’m the daughter of Mr. and Ms. Johnson, I’m 5’8”.  Who do you think you are has nothing to do with that.  It’s important for you to know exactly who you are from the crown of your head to the tips of your toes. You don’t need anyone telling you what or who you are.  That’s the kind of “who do you think you are?” that I’m  interested in. However, that’s not to say that those descriptions aren’t interesting.  They’re the kinds of facts you share with people when you first meet them.  Somewhat boring and mundane; not the “meat and potatoes” of who you are facts.

What makes you sexy, the cat’s meow, all that, and a bag of chips? If you can’t answer this question truthfully for yourself, you might have an issue with sexiness. If you think the statement is presumptuous, consider you might have an issue with being sexy. If you agree with this statement, good for you! What is it that makes some people appear sexy and attractive and others not? Is it confidence?  Is it feeling good about themselves?  Or are they just plain ole sexy?  Do you think you’re sexy? And, if so, what’s sexy about you? After all, it’s how you feel about yourself.

Sexy has come a long way.  Back in the 1930s, ankles were considered sexy.  In some cases, women would be hidden by a long curtain where only the ankles were exposed, and, of course, they would be judged by men.  There was a time when women’s bodies were covered pretty much from head to toe.  Women went swimming in long dresses, and sometimes, in pants, tights, and dresses, where every part of the body was covered.

However, a breakthrough was made when, in 1907, Annette Kellerman, a woman who dared to wear her short one-piece swimsuit (bodysuit) for a swimming competition in Boston, was arrested for indecent exposure. Annette faced a judge for her arrest and the judge who tried her case agreed that the suits at the time were cumbersome and not good for exercise.  Because of the verdict, Annette Kellerman went on to design bathing suits that were more adequate for swimming, but they took a decade to catch on.

Women’s clothes have come a long way where now we’re showing a lot of flesh and modesty, is, for the most part, a thing of the past.  Today, we wear less and less clothing and expose more and more of our bodies and share less and less of who we are as human beings.  Confidence is the new black. Confidence is being able to stand up for what you believe in. Sexy, for me, is being confident, honoring your word and believing that you love your life and you love yourself.  Sexy is saying that you do what you say you will.  Being sexy is not the only thing that creates a good relationship with yourself or others.  Sexy is a word that’s used for a lot of ideas and representations, e.g. that’s a sexy job, that’s a sexy car, etc. Today, I think sexy is relative; you’ll see what we would deem a beautiful woman walking down the street with what would be deemed an unattractive man and they’re happy.  You, in turn, would see a man that looks like a God walking down the street with a woman who’s considered overweight and unattractive, and, in both cases, people would ask what’s up with that.  Beauty and sexiness are in the eye of the beholder.  Sexy is someone who gets you because you get yourself.  Sexy is a reflection of your confidence; someone you can hold a wonderful conversation and communicate with well.  

Today, you get to say what is sexy for you.  It’s none of your business what people or the media says about you as a person.  Your way of being is sexy.  Size, shape, or form has nothing to do with what sexy is for you.  I think what’s considered sexy in popular magazines is out of date.  They’re not marketing to the masses; they’re marketing to a few demographics that might not have as much confidence due to age and where they are in the world.  I believe confidence and sexy go hand-in-hand, and when you have confidence, you’re sexy.  When you walk into a room and you light up the place with your confidence, you’re sexy.  When you’re a pleasure to be around, you’re sexy.  When people have crushes on you because you bring the love and light and you create a space that people love to be around, you’re sexy.  

Little back story. I went out with a male friend. When I got in his car, he said to me, “You look sexy tonight.”  I replied, “Thank you. Just tonight? Honey, I’m sexy all the time.” He said, “who told you that?” I replied, “I did.” He then said, “You’re not sexy until I tell you you are.”  I laughed.  I also told him, “I’m like a self-cleaning oven. I create the sexy that I am.  It’s called confidence and love of self.”

Sexy is made up of the following:

  • It’s sexy to know what it is that you love about your life and that you can speak up for it.  No matter what it is you love.  It yours; you honor it and that is sexy.  
  • Passion is sexy.  Knowing what you’re passionate about and being able to share your passion without forcing it upon people; sharing it as joy and excitement is a very sexy thing
  • Being able to know what your interests are and being able to share them is also very sexy  

What are you proud of? You have to feel proud of yourself and that you’re happy with your life.  Your happiness is contagious.  You can be proud that you keep even the smallest promise.  You’re happy and know that people are motivated by people they trust; that in itself is sexy. You know that you’re the kind of person that people can count on.  

To that end, it’s important you create yourself the way you see yourself.  That you’re sexy and confident or confident and sexy; the order doesn’t matter.  Don’t allow others to determine who you are.  The way you feel about yourself speaks volumes.  When you’re happy about yourself and you can go from good to great about yourself and people know, like, and trust you, you can become whoever you say you are.

So I ask this question again.  Are you sexy?  The answer is HELL YEAH!

Not sure if you’re sexy or not? Talk to me and we can see why you don’t feel sexy. Visit www.noreensumptercoach.com to sign up for a FREE 15-minute Hello Call!

Love yourself. Until next time!

Fall In Love With Yourself – Know, Like, and Trust –then there’s no turning back.

The first step with regards to doing anything is more often than not the most difficult.  However, Martin Luther King, a.k.a. my birthday twin and hero said, “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”

The first step is like a breath of fresh air. “Fear nothing, attempt everything, unknow!” -Unknown

Take the first step to owning your voice, speaking your truth, and fall in love with yourself.

Like most things in life, what it commonly boils down to is simple: we need each other – whether we like it or not. If we are to exist and live, we require healthy relationships that can teach us how to know and expand ourselves. How we speak to ourselves, the opinions we have, and labels we give ourselves are a telltale sign of how we manage ourselves and will determine how we choose to share and treat others. I like to base this on the three phases of creating relationships, which is widely used in business networking, and I’ll use here to show how we love ourselves.  An example of this is the Know, Like, and Trust Factor.  To have a successful relationship, consider that if you understand these three phases, and use them on yourself and others to create relationships.  

There’s no difference between having a relationship with yourself or another person. Having a relationship with another person gives you a mirror to see yourself. It’s important that we take these phases, put them into action, and then practice them. Adopting these steps will help you build meaningful connections which can result in meaningful, stable relationships.  

Step 1: Know

Just like you would get to know another human being, it’s important to get to know yourself. It’s important to know yourself in a way that allows you to know and share what you’re about.  What you say about yourself becomes law in your universe. So asking yourself questions is important to know and understand what you’re saying about yourself and how you show up in the world amongst your friends, colleagues, family, and everyone.  Such as:

-What do I do?

-What do I know?

-Where am I from?

-What am I interested in?

-What inspires me?

-What am I committed to?

-What do I care about?

-Who am I as a human being?

-What do I love about my life? Myself? (This one’s my favorite)

As we all know, there are a million-and-one questions one could ask and know about oneself. However, the key is to be able to share your discoveries so that others can be related to what you know about yourself and, in turn, feel free to share themselves.

The more you know about yourself, and the more you can share, the more open and secure you will be. Personal freedom provides a space for others to know you and, in turn, you will get to know them.  However, there are no guarantees.  No one has to share themselves with you.  Consider what it takes for you to learn about yourself.  It might’ve not been easy.  It calls for a particular level of trust which brings us to step number 2:

Step 2: Like

The “Like” I’m talking about is how you feel about yourself.  It’s not the kind of “like” where you compromise yourself because you want to be validated.  That kind lives as no respect; no sense of self  “like me; please like me.” The kind where one is not very confident and will compromise themselves.  That is not the same  “like.”  

“Do you like yourself?” is one of the first questions I often ask my clients. What I’ve found is some people have a difficult time with this question.  If you experience hesitation, take a long pause, or hear crickets when you find yourself sitting in your head not being present, waiting for answers; then this should be a clue to you that you might not like yourself.  

This kind of person excites me and saddens me at the same time.  A person that likes themselves, usually answers the question as soon as it’s asked. There’s no hesitation; they’re not making themselves wrong.

Am I pleasant?

Am I respectful?

Do I do as I say I will when I say I will do it?

Do I have things in common with others?

What are my values?

Can I trust myself?

Do I accept myself?

Am I likable?

Am I generous?

Do I find myself attractive?

Do I care about myself?

Do I nurture myself, my dreams, and aspirations?

How are my confidence and self-esteem?

How do I see myself?

These questions seem easy. However, if you can’t answer them, you might find yourself experiencing difficulty sharing with people.

Step 3: Trust

Trust is the fuel in your tank of life.  If you trust yourself, you can and will trust others, as you ultimately know that you’re the person that is choosing to trust.  You know that you’re the one that is responsible for your belief to believe in trust.  With that, you create a sense of freedom.  You have power and, you can, in turn, depend on yourself to take care of yourself and ask the right questions, so you don’t wallow in regret and mess.  Trusting yourself provides you the power to listen to your instincts and follow your wisdom, discover the places that get activated; for instance, your gut when you don’t feel trust. You make yourself your authority on what is right for you.  Which helps develop the confidence that you can provide others. You’ll go within yourself rather than looking for answers outside yourself or from others; always being aware that no one has your answers.  However, not negating that there will be times when you’ll have to seek guidance from others. Seeking help will be a form of contrast in areas of your life that you are unfamiliar.  People will give their tuppence worth; ultimately you still have to choose what’s true for you based upon your level of self-trust.

Do I trust myself?

Do I trust my behaviors? Habits?

Can I trust myself to handle life challenges?

Do I trust and stand for myself?

Do I trust and believe in myself?

Can I trust my judgments?

Can I trust that I’m working in my best interest?

Do I believe that I’m growing and developing as a human being?

Do I know if I have trust in myself?

Can I be trusted?

Do people trust me?

Do I honor my word?

 

Consequently, until you have gone through these three phases personally, you will have a hard time going through them with others.  Without self-trust, you will always be looking outside of yourself, consider that you’ll experience challenging times growing, creating, and developing yourself.

Have faith, stay strong, and be interested in yourself so that you can be interested in others.  

From time to time you may feel as though your life isn’t working.  One thing to remember is that you’re not an object nor are you static.  You are a fluid human being who is forever changing, growing, shifting, and transforming in your life.  

Be consistent and play with these phases. Commit know, like, and trust to memory. Go easy, and most of all have fun, own your voice, speak your truth, and Live Life Your Way!

If you want to start exploring yourself a bit more, don’t forget you can sign on to my website, www.noreensumptercoach.com to schedule a FREE 15 minute Hello Call at anytime.

Love yourself. Until next time!

You Have The Light, We All Have The Light

Natural landscape and sun rising at skyline

For a long time, I could not grasp conversations about the Light.  Your light, “She shines so bright”. “Your presence lights up the room”. “She brings the light.”  “She’s so bright”, and so on. What I used say about myself instead was: “I bring the party!” I never thought of myself as someone who brings the light. People would often talk about this concept with me and I had no idea what the light meant.  It would make me feel uncomfortable; I thought they knew something I should know and I just didn’t.  I would get frustrated – not angry really, just uncomfortable. However, I really had no clue about what the light meant.

I was used to hearing priests, vicars, and people of the clergy speak about the light and I’ve read about the light in the Bible.  I always thought the light was something that only people who were deeply religious experienced.  But I started to rethink my ideas when I started to hear it being said to me.

I was embarrassed because I did not really consider myself a “good person”.  I was the girl that always got into trouble in school. I was the sneaky, giggly girl with my conniving face, always cracking jokes.  I became the girl who was known to be a distraction.  Only good people or good girls had the light, people that could focus, pay attention and follow rules.  Not me.  I loved to giggle and laugh and I attracted (and distracted) many people in my desire for fun.

I now understand that everyone has the light and everyone is here to shine their light. It is the Godly, spirit light; no matter what you believe in, it still shines.  “You have a light”, I’d hear from complete strangers, people I just met, people I worked with – all kinds of people clued me in on this.  I’ve also heard you have a light that shines all over the place.  In the beginning of my understanding, I would think: “what the hell” they are talking about? To be honest, I was uncomfortable because I knew intuitively that the light came with some kind of responsibility that I did not know and I didn’t want to take on. I also knew I would find out and have to deal with it eventually.  It made my stomach hurt, triggering congestion in my solar plexus. I wanted to throw up but never could, and luckily the feeling would eventually pass.  Writing this article and sharing about the light, I feel vulnerable and exposed and still want to throw up to this day.

In life, sometimes understanding takes a (colloquial) minute for things to register – by register, I mean grow into a full understanding where it goes from theory to practice and then assimilation.  I soon started to realize what the light truly meant.

I have a light.  I started to own my light, fully embrace its power and build my confidence.  I started to do the things that were important to me, no matter what it looked like.  Honing my truth was not easy, and I had to take risks and be willing to fail, to feel hurt.  I did not and still do not want to feel hurt, disappointed or rejected.  I had to be willing to experience these lessons, and as a Personal Life Coach, I had to be a model for who I was teaching through my work.  Now don’t get me wrong here – I have my own unique journey, and as a Personal Life Coach, I respect that people each have their own journey.  I didn’t want to be like everyone else – knowing that I am just like everyone else, it is like fashion, we want something new and unique only to realize that everyone else is wearing NY black, we all have the ability to choose and make choices, take risks and fail.

I’ve seen the light in babies, I feel the light in people and I know that all people have this light somewhere inside themselves.  My clients learn to harness this energy by doing the things that expand their life and light when they work with me on their goals and partner with me as their Personal Life Coach.  I started to experience my own light and feel it, when I let go of my fears and concerns about things I could not control.  I started to understand and learn how to build my light.  It is built by the good, positive energy that we give to the world through our thoughts, actions and deeds.  I started to understand how to gain light. I did so by focusing on my work, coaching clients, saying generous compliments, sending out positive energy, loving myself and enjoying my work.  All of these actions honor both my clients and my own gifts. I see the light when I am happy and even when I am not as happy, and I know this light will never disappear.

I love when I have experiences which I now celebrate and call “Kiss Noreen Day”.  One Wednesday morning, at the Business Networking International Group (BNI), I was awarded the Golden Microphone by one of my colleagues after he had won it the prior year.  He awarded it to me for supporting him in an area of his life that was affecting his business and impacting his confidence.  I was truly honored and this was another opportunity to build even more light.  I appreciate love and light, I appreciate that he was able to accept my coaching, hear my suggestions and take necessary action to transform his life and business.  For me, making a difference as a Personal Life Coach is what I dedicate all of myself to.  I love it.

Today, I honor the gift of being a Personal Life Coach.  I honor my light profoundly, and because of this discovery, I can fully honor the light in my clients and everyone around me.  I love my clients and encourage people to see their own light and grow it.  Being fearless, forgiving others (and themselves) and displaying strength helps them expand their confidence and self-esteem.  I love the light, and I honor the light so that the light will honor me.

Here are parts of the past that we love to dwell on and sometimes wallow in. The present is where life exists; it’s what is happening now and is alive. The future is what we pray, hope and desire to live in and get to.

The past has teeth – or maybe dentures

The past has really strong teeth. The bite of the past can be one that is either relished or resisted. The bite depends on whether your teeth are real, or if they are dentures.  The strength of the past is clever, as it works with all human emotions.  It also works with our perceptions of the world – not the way things truly are but the way we see it or believe it. If we are stronger than the bite of the past, we display the courage to let go of the past and cut off the supply of nutrients it requires to feed off our memory.  Doing so will then lead us to making more realistic, workable choices. Our minds automatically use only the parts of the past that it thinks are valuable and rarely allows us to play in the now. Before we realize it, we take the same small steps into the future we have always taken, which rapidly become our past again.

The past can resemble an elderly person who has lived life from a place of complete joy, or it can look like a place of pure sadness. One of these pictures is happy and full of life, able to see things in a new way that brings continued happiness and joy. On the other hand, the person who has chosen to live an unhappy, distressed life sees everything as a burden, where every day is heavy and they are depressed, angry and don’t want to transform their situation; they are dying inside and out. They aren’t willing to attempt anything new or see life as a series of opportunities.  The past runs their life and they cease to grow.

The present is full of possibilities

Life in the present is spontaneous, open and full of possibilities.  The past is worthless and has no real place in the present. The past thinks it needs to be there in order to “protect” us.  In many ways, this is a good thing, because otherwise we would get run over, or fall down the stairs, etc. The present, however, is committed to the things that bring us joy, and moves life forward step by step, moment by moment.  The present is full of endless possibilities and where issues are forgiven and put aside; when a lesson is learned, what results from that situation can always be useful. There is never any right or wrong answers; there is only what actually happened. The present allows us to live our lives from a very powerful place, with a deep sense of awareness that creates a life of creativity, imagination and wow! The present makes room for trusting our intuitions, and is a place where many doors are always open in the now. It is place where we can live with a fresh outlook. In the now, all issues become relatively easy and accessible to us, helping us to achieve our goals that much faster.

The future makes no promises

The future makes no promises; it merely depends on one’s perceptions of life. Its view depends on how one holds onto that gentle glimmer of hope. The future has lots of different textures.  Some are soft and smooth, and others are hard and rough. The textures of the future are like the textures of life.  It all depends on the ones that one wants or feels attached to.  The future also can be held in the grip of fear – fear of the past.  Fear of repeating past mistakes.   The future makes no promises that your goals will be met, and it is always met in the now.

The future is patient; it allows for one step at a time in the now.  It likes the structure of making plans.  However, it is more likely to work out when a plan is flexible, yet unwavering in its commitment, and dedicated to being free from any type of attachment.  This is no easy task!

The future likes when you are clear about your requests and do not operate from a perspective of complaints. In combination with the present and the universe (life unfolding moment by moment), such a way of operating can only bring what is desired. It is required that you monitor your thoughts and remain present, free of doubt and fear, meticulous and present to negativity that enters your thoughts. Being free of all concerns is truly an impossibility – what is possible is noticing that you have doubts (or fears, concerns or considerations) and put them off to one side (do not operate from those concerns/considerations) because this is how you sustain your power. This means you can just be human and be superhuman at the same time.  To be both though means that you must be able to catch yourself when you do (or think) the things that don’t work for you.

The more authentic you are, the more you become aware of the powers of the past and what is in your now; only then can you feel the present clearly.  The future will take care of itself because of the observations and declarations you make in the now. You will see that the trio will be obedient to your wishes; keep in mind though that the past is always poised to infiltrate into whichever way you choose to go.

The past, present and future all hold incredible power. By using your mind to catch yourself, you can learn discipline and work consistently in the now! The key is working only in the NOW, as everything else is either in the past or the future.  These are places where you have absolutely no control, so there is no need to be concerned about the past or the future at all!

Noreen Sumpter

 

Be Thankful

Thanksgiving background. Autumn fruit with Thanksgiving letters. Thanksgiving dinner

Today is a day for giving thanks.  I woke from my bed this morning feeling emotionally challenged. In my daily practice of gratitude. I thought about Thanksgiving.  In that moment, I choose to see Thanksgiving for what it means to me.

I’m not American and I often forget about it until the week before.  However, I saw my gratitude for my life in all its iterations. Whether, in its present state of being up or down, life going the way I want and or not at all how I’d like.  Either way, I am grateful.

I’m grateful for the amazing opportunities this year. Grateful for love. Being in a relationship, which at times was beautiful and other times not.  Grateful for learning to keep my heart open, when at times I wanted to put it in a vault, slam the door and keep it there – Thank you

I’m grateful for having the opportunity to expand my capacity to give, receive love and be open in ways that I never experienced as possible.

I’m grateful to have loved people who have not always loved me back the way I wanted, yet loved me the way they could. (I’ve been that person. I now have a view from both sides of the love table.) I am thankful for my family. For the love, I have for my brothers though their love seems so distance.

I am grateful for the people and friendship that are no longer physically present in my life. Friends who have supported me with my dreams no matter how dreamy. When times were not so good or great, you will never be forgotten and the memories we created will live in my cells – for they have helped me grow.

I am grateful and thankful for my health for Diabetes even though I wish it were not there.  I own it, I accept it and I will manage it completely.  For the pain of exercise walking/running moving the tool which is my body and being able to forgive myself when I didn’t.  For being able to make myself right where as before I would have trashed myself for failing and given up altogether.

“I’m grateful to know love’s secret. To receive love it must be given with no thought of its return. Love is a gift that no return is demanded.”  Og Mandino

For my economic challenge, I am grateful for learning and putting into practice the understanding that money is a tool and it is not an actual measure of my worth.

I am grateful for all the books, that I’ve read and for the authors, teachers, lovers, friends for if your dream did not manifest, I could not expand.

The history of Thanksgiving might not be so relevant these days.  However, the sentiment is still important.

Giving thanks. I give thanks for the power to love, think, will, and laugh, imagine, create, plan and speak.  I give that for choosing to honor my gifts knowing that I can choose to cry for my unfulfilled dreams, let failure beat me down, let circumstances trample my self-esteem, sacrifice my personal potential for the illusion of security, dishonor my individuality, deem myself incorrect and or I can misuse my talents or hide them in a trunk (Hell No).  I am grateful for the knowing and the actions that I can take.  Thank you for my humanity and the humanity of us all on this planet.

So on this Thanksgiving Day, If you wish, find one thing that you can be authentically thankful for and be thankful and then share it with another soul.

Noreen Sumpter

Personal Life Coach

 

Identifying Core Values: What Do You Choose to Live By?

As I grow as a person/human being, it is important to understand values from which I develop my world and my life. No one has to agree with my values.  However, I have to share them.  These are the 20 core values that I choose to live by.

Fun, laughter and joy are important to me.
Fun, laughter & joy are important to me.
  1. I love myself freely so I can love others
  2. Making myself right so I will not make others wrong
  3. Embracing my dreams, so I can live into my visions
  4. Honoring my difference and rarity
  5. People can say whatever they want as I am in control of the meaning I make in my life
  6. Having a curious mind and trusting myself
  7. Being a lifelong learner and discovering what works for me
  8. I am enough and I have enough and there is enough
  9. Expressing my passion, owning and being responsible for my drama
  10. Having the courage to have courage and knowing sometimes I have fear
  11. I am grateful for my life and all that happens
  12. Knowing I have free will
  13. Knowing I have choice and I make my own choices
  14. I am a blessing
  15. I am a reflection of the beauty and the beauty that surrounds me
  16. I have many gifts and I am generosity it is an important tool for me
  17. Having healthy relationships are important
  18. Fun, laughter and joy, happiness with myself
  19. Compassion with myself and others
  20. Living life my way, with my truth, is important

What are your core values and what do you choose to live by? I would love to hear them.

Live Life Your Way,

Noreen Sumpter Life Coach

Remembrance

The day the planes hit the towers was a day I will never forget.

I was in a BNI meeting in the Grand Central area, when one of the members came into the meeting laughing and saying that the World Trade Center has been hit by a plane.  Now, I did not think that was funny even if it had been his idea of a sick joke.  As I looked at him in disgust and horror I said “That’s not fucking funny”.  Cut my eye (dirty look) and continued in the meeting. I had no idea whether a plane had hit the WTC was true or not until I went outside and saw a television in I think a bank and there it was as plain as the nose on my face the tower on fire.  A plane crashing into the World Trade Center.  My thought instantly was about my friends who worked at the Landmark Center in the World Trade Center.  Were they ok? OMG, I was supposed to be there at 10:00am for my Introduction Leaders Assisting Agreement.  Surely, this was not real, I thought to myself.  It couldn’t be.  My mind was in a tizzy trying to connect the dots and have this all make sense.

My first thought was there was no way I was going to go back down town.  Let alone go across any bridge.  I saw people on various televisions that I passed walking across the bridge covered in dust and papers and ashes strewn in the air.  I was not going to walk across that bridge.  My thought was God only knows what could be waiting on the bridge and then the next thing was all the ash, God only knows what’s in it.  I really don’t need that on my body.  I decided to go as far uptown as possible.  Whatever they were bombing, I doubted they would go uptown.  That was my thought.  I started walking, I had a plan that morning.  I would go to my Bloomingdales to return a suit that I had bought because I had gotten the same suit at Century for 50% off the original cost.  So I decided then even if it was the end of NY, I would return the suit as it gave me something to do, until I tried to work out what to do.  So I walked to Bloomingdales.  Please don’t ask me how I got there.  All I know is I did, I got there in a daze.  I could not stop crying.  While in Bloomingdales, I got into squabbles with foreigners who were talking smack about America.  I was upset as this was not the time for squabbling.  I walked around Bloomingdales like a zombie.  Crying and sitting and crying some more.  It was time to get out of Bloomingdales and make another plan.

My cellphone was not working.  I could not reach anyone and no one could reach me.  Thank God for payphones, what few there were and every now and then I would get a signal. I met a women who was hysterical crying in the Chicken shop.  “You still have to eat in a crisis.”  She was crying because she said she looked Arab and was afraid that she would be attacked.  I hugged her and told her she would be fine.  She was actually West Indian, Trinidadian she was fine.  We ate chicken and cried a little because that was all I could do as I had no idea what to do.

As I was sitting in the Chicken place eating my chicken and crying.  I had a thought.  Where the hell was Will Smith?  How come he did not swoop in and save the day?  My brain couldn’t comprehend what was happening.  I did not have a real past experience of what was happening.  My brain needed to make meaning out of this situation.  Will Smith was my reality.  Independence Day was what was happening in NY and Will would save me and save us all.  Not like a leading lady or any of that stuff, just he would make it better.  Make this planes, fire and the bombs go away by killing whatever Alien has done this.  That was my reality or the unreality of this.

Finally, I was able to reach my ILP coach Laurie who suggested we should all meet at Tim’s house on Park Avenue.  Ok, I walked to Tim’s house his beautiful large studio that was immaculate with his huge bed.  I was emotionally spent that day.  I walked into Tim’s house and plopped on his bed and went to sleep.  I wake up to them saying lets go to church. I got myself together and we went to a Catholic church.  On the way out of the church walking near Bryant Park.  It was late into the night now and I really wanted to go home.  I happened to meet some people who I recognized from my neighborhood.  It amazing that a crisis brings us close together were we are no longer strangers.  I called to them.  They recognized me just as much as I did them. However, this was different kind of day. Today, we just didn’t nod and go on we connected, were interested in each other’s welfare.  I then said goodbye to my people my coach and Tim, they checked if I would be okay with these people.  I got on the C train or one of those trains and rode home.  The funny thing though, I felt like an alien on the train.  I sat next to a women who I started talking to, she looked me dead in the face and did not respond.  I swear, I felt as though I had died and gone to zombie land because everyone on the train was disconnected.  My train took me home fast and without issue.  I came home where I connected with my neighbors.  Only to discover that a few neighbors worked in the center or close by.  One was late for work that day so the fire turned around and went home, another was at work in a building close by and had witness people jumping to their deaths and bodies exploding on the sidewalk.  She was devastated.  For her, I left my door open and my apartment became a respite for her to express and talk so she could be supported or just to cry and lastly, neighbor upstairs was killed when the building fell down.  It was said, hearsay that she was in the basement when the towers came down trying to get people out.  That was the kind of person she was, providing support the best way she could from me with my bike to people in a bombed building.

I try not to think about 9/11 as a terrible day as I know it was.  I think of the upside if I can call it that.  I think of a city of people who banded together.  To hug, give hope, and continue to make our city great.  I Love New York.  For the people that perished in the World Trade Center.  You are gone and you will never be forgotten.

September_11th_Tribute_in_Light_from_Bayonne,_New_Jersey

The Release: Move Life Forward and Create Power, Freedom & Self-Expression

The release flyer 7-21

The Release is very powerful.  People who have done The Release walked away free from (shit). Shit that has been lingering in their lives for an inordinate amount of time.

Look, there is no point in me mincing words. Celebrate your humanity. We are human, after all. We have a lot of shit in our lives that is worrisome to us.

“I have shit that I am still discovering life after 15 years of transformational work. Am I the same person I was 15 years ago no. Do I still have shit? Yes. Will I be unloading shit and creating new shit in life yes and yes”.

Join us for The Releasing of: Old hurts, dead and lifeless relationships, Toxic relationships, Toxic Ties, old agreements, wounds, old barriers, upsets, disappointment, shame, sexual, body, financial. Guilt, not good enough, fear, inferiority, indecisiveness, procrastination, promises, old pattern, unhealthy behaviors, broken agreements with self and others, habits that no longer work, loss.

These are all conversations that one might be hoarding about self that no longer, or have never, empowered or moved your life forward.

Truth, if you are human you have things you want to release. Let’s not belabor this conversation. If you would like to attend, or considering attending, contact:

WWW.NoreenSumpterCoach.com

917 945 5907

The Herbshoppe

394 Atlantic Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11217

(718) 422-7981

Let’s move life forward and create power freedom and full self-expression. So you can live your life being happy, fulfilled and having made a difference in the world.

Live Life Your Way,

Noreen Sumpter

Strengthen What Remains

I met Toni Hatton at a conference a few years ago.  We had always “threatened” to do something together and had not up until now. 

I will be participating in her “Strengthen What Remains” Speaker’s Summit on Monday, June 29th.

Who Toni is for me is a dynamic lady who cares about people having what they desire in life.  She is about manifestation.  Toni is a woman who enjoys creating partnerships with everyone she meets.  She loves to share and she is shiny.  The beauty is that she does it  about being an Attractive Thinker. Hence her company is the http://www.theattractivethinker.guru/

It’s not that we cannot have what we desire.  It is that we have a difficult time holding onto our dreams. We get caught up in the time it takes to manifest them.  We get caught up in having them exactly the way we create them and it provides with no room for magic to happen. Everyone has confidence where they are strong. However, there are areas where we are not and in this talk you will discover there is power in pain, nothing in your life is wasted. 

Together, we will break down limiting beliefs, have straight communications, be transparent and most of all we will have fun.  I am offering a free 15-minute consultation to you. You will come away excited to have a conversation that will be the beginning of a life transformation.

Live Life Your Way,

Noreen Sumpter